قراءة كتاب The Wit and Humor of America, Volume V. (of X.)

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The Wit and Humor of America, Volume V. (of X.)

The Wit and Humor of America, Volume V. (of X.)

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دار النشر: Project Gutenberg
الصفحة رقم: 2

Tries to Get a Wife

Anne Virginia Culbertson 142 Musical Review Extraordinary John Phoenix 30 My First Cigar Robert J. Burdette 220 My Ruthers James Whitcomb Riley 197 Night in a Rocking-Chair, A Kate Field 124 Old Grimes Albert Gorton Greene 24 Piano in Arkansas, A Thomas Bangs Thorpe 112 Quit Yo' Worryin' Anne Virginia Culbertson 157 Rollo Learning to Play Robert J. Burdette 132 Runaway Boy, The James Whitcomb Riley 38 Set of China, The Elisa Leslie 12 Simon Starts in the World J.J. Hooper 96 Spring Beauties, The Helen Avery Cone 9 Strike of One, The Elliott Flower 84 Suppressed Chapters Carolyn Wells 22 Tiddle-Iddle-Iddle-Iddle-Bum! Bum! Wilbur D. Nesbit 218 Whar Dem Sinful Apples Grow Anne Virginia Culbertson 121 Willy and the Lady Gelett Burgess 72 Woman Who Married an Owl, The Anne Virginia Culbertson 44

COMPLETE INDEX AT THE END OF VOLUME X.


THE WIT AND HUMOR OF AMERICA


THE MARRIAGE OF SIR JOHN SMITH

By Phœbe Cary

Not a sigh was heard, nor a funeral tone,
As the man to his bridal we hurried;
Not a woman discharged her farewell groan,
On the spot where the fellow was married.
We married him just about eight at night,
Our faces paler turning,
By the struggling moonbeam's misty light,
And the gas-lamp's steady burning.
No useless watch-chain covered his vest,
Nor over-dressed we found him;
But he looked like a gentleman wearing his best,
With a few of his friends around him.
Few and short were the things we said,
And we spoke not a word of sorrow,
But we silently gazed on the man that was wed,
And we bitterly thought of the morrow.
We thought, as we silently stood about,
With spite and anger dying,
How the merest stranger had cut us out,
With only half our trying.
Lightly we'll talk of the fellow that's gone,
And oft for the past upbraid him;
But little he'll reck if we let him live on,
In the house where his wife conveyed him.
But our hearty task at length was done,
When the clock struck the hour for retiring;
And we heard the spiteful squib and pun
The girls were sullenly firing.
Slowly and sadly we turned to go,—
We had struggled, and we were human;
We shed not a tear, and we spoke not our woe,
But we left him alone with his woman.

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