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قراءة كتاب Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, December 12, 1917
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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, December 12, 1917
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Charged with selling bacon that was bad, a firm of grocers pleaded that the stuff had been released by the Government. At first sight it looked as if it had merely escaped from custody.
The man who was last week charged at a London police court with posing as a Government official has been put back for the state of his mind to be inquired into.
Scandalised Voice from Gallery. "'ERE, WOT'S THE PAPER CONTROLLER DOIN'?""The late Mr. Merryweather, who was in his 78th year, was responsible for great developments in fire-lighting appliances."—Scotsman.
A good scheme—light it first and fight it afterwards.
"Supposing a wolf were to attack you and your family, what would you do?—Mr. Hedderwick.
"I would point out that season tickets are issued by railway companies only as an act of grace.—Sir William Forbes."—The Star.
Our contemporary heads this "Words Winged To-day."
From "A Word to the Churches," by Miss MARIE CORELLI:—
"'A word' of solemn warning was uttered by the Angel of the Seven Spirits to the Church in Sardis....
"And this 'word' was fulfilled to the letter, for, as Herodotus tells us, 'Sardis was taken and utterly sacked.'"—Daily Graphic.
We fancy the passage must occur in Book X., in which we also find the famous account of the capture of Timbuctoo by the Roman Emperor Montezuma in the fourth Punic War—or was it the fifth Crusade?
TO THE GERMAN PEOPLE.
Each to his taste: if you prefer
The KAISER'S whip across your flanks;
If you enjoy the bloody spur
That rips your cannon-fodder's ranks;
If to his boots you still adhere,
Kissing 'em as you've always kissed 'em,
Why, who are we to interfere
With your internal Teuton system?
If from your bonds you know quite well
You might, this moment, find release,
Changing, at will, your present hell
For Liberty's heaven of lasting peace;
If yet, for habit's sake, you choose
This reign of steel, this rule of terror,
It's not for us to push our views
And point you out your silly error.
Herein I speak as I am taught—
That your affairs are yours alone,
Though, for myself, I should have thought
They had a bearing on my own;
Have I no right to interpose,
Urging on you a free autonomy,
Just as your U-boats shove their nose
In my interior economy?
I'm told we have no quarrel, none,
With you as Germans. That's absurd.
Myself, I hate all sorts of Hun,
Yet will I say one kindly word:
If, still refusing Freedom's part,
You keep the old Potsdam connection,
With all my sympathetic heart
I wish you joy of that selection.
O.S.
AN ORDER OF THE DAY.
In my opinion the value of the stock letter has distinct limitations. What I mean to say is that if there is in a Government office a series of half a dozen standard epistles, one or other of which can be used as a reply to the majority of the conundrums that daily serve to bulge the post-bag of the "controller" or "director," the selection of