our pusillanimous critics) was positively repulsive.

Tommy. "'ANDS UP, ALL OF YER, I'M GOIN' ON LEAVE TERMORRER. AIN'T GOT NO TIME TO WASTE."

OUR INNOCENT SUBALTERNS.

The leave-boat had come into port and there was the usual jam around the gangways. On the quay at the foot of one of them was a weary-looking officer performing the ungrateful task of detailing officers for tours of duty with the troops. He had squares of white cardboard in his hand, and here and there, as the officers trooped down the gangway, he picked out a young and inoffensive-looking subaltern and subpoenaed him.

I chanced to notice a young and rosy-cheeked second-lieutenant, innocent of the ways of this rude world, and I knew he was doomed.

As he passed out on to the wharf I saw him receive one of those white cards; he was also told to report to the corporal at the end of the quay.

I saw him slip behind a truck, where he left his bag and haversack, his gloves and his cane, and when he reappeared on the far side he had on his rain-coat, without stars. He had also altered the angle of his cap.

He waited near the foot of the other gangway, which was unguarded. I drew nearer to see what he would do. Presently down the plank came an oldish man—a lieutenant with a heavy moustache and two African ribbons. My young friend stepped forward.

"You are detailed for duty," I heard him say. "You will report to the N.C.O. at the end of the quay." His intonation was a model for the Staff College.

"Curse the thing! I knew I should be nabbed for duty," I heard the veteran growl as he strode off with the white card...

I met the young man later at the Hotel ——, where he had had the foresight to wire for a room. As I had failed to do this, I was glad to avail myself of his kind offer to share his accommodation. After such hospitality I could not refuse him a lift in my car, as we were both bound for the same part of the country.

I did not learn until afterwards that a preliminary chat with my chauffeur had preceded his hospitable advances. Whenever anybody tells me that our subalterns of to-day lack savoir faire or that they are deficient in tactical initiative, I tell him that he lies.

"A Bachelor, 38, wishes meet Protestant, born 4th Sept., 1899, or 17th, 18th Sept., 1886, plain looks; poverty no barrier; view matrimony."—The Age (Melbourne).

For so broad-minded a man he seems curiously fastidious about dates.

HUMOURS OF THE WAR OFFICE.

THE EXCHANGE.

Our Modest Publicists.

"I felt it to be my duty to say that and I said it; and, of course, nobody took any notice."—Mr. Robert Blatchford, in "The Sunday Chronicle."

"CHRISTIANA, Thursday.

Several hours' violent cannonading was heard in the Skagerack.

Norwegian torpedoes proceeded thither