Fond Mother. I really take it vastly kind,

This visit, my dear creature!

A family likeness here you'll find.

(Like hers? Not in one feature!)

Friendly Visitor. Only too happy, I am sure,

To see the little darling,

Our family friendships are so pure!

(They find effect in snarling.)

Fond Mother. Well, dear, with your experience,

Your aid must be of value.

You've not yet given its help immense.

(Nor, if I know it, shall you!)

Friendly Visitor. Ah! Good Nurse G-SCH-N, is she out,

That you the babe are dandling?

Sweet-tempered child and strong, no doubt!

(The brat wants careful handling.)

Fond Mother. G-SCH-N and D-KE are both at hand,

But I'm so proud to show it.

The weakness you will understand

(Envious, and knows I know it!)

Friendly Visitor. Mothers must be as vigilant

As—say 'Bus-strikers' pickets.

It cries, dear! What does baby want?

(Half-starved, and has the rickets!)

Fond Mother. Which, think you, the best Infant's Food?

You see there are so many;

I know your judgment is so good!

(Not worth a single penny!)

Friendly Visitor. Well, dear, don't swaddle it too tight.

That ruins the digestion,

And—Forster's Food I've found work right.

(She'll relish that suggestion!)

Fond Mother. Humph! Rather out of date, I fear!

You've slight experience—lately—

Next time you nurse you'll know, my dear!

(She'll like that home-thrust greatly!)

Friendly Visitor. Your nursing, dear, of course, is based

Upon my Nursery Manual.

The child looks rayther peaky-faced.

(Not quite a hardy annual!)

Fond Mother. Think so? Look up, and laugh, my sweet,

Show NANA she's mistaken—

It quite begins to "feel its feet."

(With spite her soul is shaken!)

Friendly Visitor. I understand your family

Call it "The Changeling." Why so?

The family likeness all must see.

(It squints with the left eye so!)

Fond Mother. Oh! there are always some cross things

In every Family Party.

Your mother's heart has felt such stings!

(She'll think of JOE and HARTY!)

Friendly Visitor. Well, well, with my advice, my dear,

And lots of Liberal Tonic,

Your child we possibly may rear.

(That's one for Old Sardonic!)

Fond Mother. Oh! really you are quite too kind!

Your own "Home-Rule Elixir"

Unfailing for your babes you find?

(Fancy that dart will fix her!)

Friendly Visitor. You see we breed, and nurse, our own;

We do not steal or borrow.

However, dear, I must be gone.

(To call again to-morrow!)

Fond Mother. What! must you go? Next, time no doubt.

You'll give more Liberal measure.

Nurse G. shall see you safely out,

(With most particular pleasure!)

Friendly Visitor. Don't trouble, dear! The bell I'll pull,

And, bid them call my cabby!

Good bye! The Babe's be-you-ti-ful!

(A Flabby, Dabby, Babby!!!)