"A Harmony in Green and Rose."

The Mother (disappointed). Now, why can't he give it some sensible name, instead of taking away all one's interest!

The Phil. Uncle (whom a succession of Symphonies and Harmonies has irritated to the verge of fury). Don't talk to me, Sir! Don't tell me any of these things are pictures. Look at this—a young woman in an outlandish dress sitting on the floor—on the bare floor!—in a litter of Japanese sketches! And he has the confounded impertinence to call it a "Caprice"—a "Caprice in Purple and Gold." I'd purple and gold him, Sir, if I had my way! Where's the sense in such things? What do they teach you? What story do they tell? Where's the human interest in them? Depend upon it, Sir, these things are rubbish—sheer rubbish, according to all my notions of Art, and I think you'll allow I ought to know something about it?

His Nephew (provoked beyond prudence). You certainly ought to know more than that, my dear Unc—Are you going?

The Uncle (grimly). Yes—to see my Solicitor, Sir. (To himself, savagely.) That confounded young prig will find he's paid dear enough for his precious Whistlers—if I don't have a fit in the cab!

[He goes; the Nephew wonders whether his attempt at proselytising was quite worth while.

A Seriously Elderly Lady. I've no patience with the man. Look at GUTSTAVE DORÉ, now. I'm sure he was a beautiful artist, if you like. Did he go and call his "Leaving the Prætorium" a "Symphony" or a "Harmony," or any nonsense of that kind? Of course not—and yet look at the difference!

An Impressionable Person (carried away by the local influence—to the Man at the wicket, blandly). Could you kindly oblige me by exchanging this "Note in Black and White" for an "Arrangement in Silver and Gold"?

[Finds himself cruelly misunderstood, and suspected of frivolity.

PERSONAL PARAGRAPHS.

The Rev. No. 354, writing from Dartmoor, requests us to inform his numerous friends in Bath and elsewhere that his health is much improved by the bracing air, and that he is occupied in revising for the press his course of Sermons to the Young on the Moral Virtues. He is also anxious to inform his creditors that his accounts are now completely in order. It is a source of great comfort to him to reflect that he was able to obtain considerable sums of money from his friends in Bath, before he was obliged to leave that city, and that, with the residue of this money, obtained so to speak from PETER, he will now have the satisfaction of paying a farthing in the pound to PAUL, in other words, to his creditors.

Mrs. BRINVILLIERS was yesterday visited by her friends. Our readers will be glad to know that she is quite well and has escaped the influenza epidemic.

Mr. ST. LEONARDS, with the consent of the Governor, takes this opportunity of thanking the friends who have so kindly condoled with him on the unavoidable interruption to his long and arduous work in the service of his country. He hopes that nothing will prevent him from displaying equal zeal in the still more arduous labour, which, also for the benefit of his country, he is now compelled to undertake for a certain period.

Miss DODGER is still unwell. The HOME SECRETARY has not yet sent instructions for a special drawing-room to be fitted up in the prison, nor has he, up till now, given any permission for Miss DODGER's afternoon receptions, and five o'clock teas. It is generally considered that the probability of his doing so, without a Special Act of Parliament, is still very remote.

BROKEN BONDS.

["I learn from St. Petersburg, that, last Saturday, conferences were begun between Russia and Germany on the admission of the former to the new commercial treaties."—The Times Paris Correspondent on "Russia and the Central Commercial League."]

La Belle France, the Forsaken One, loquitur:—

[Left doubting.

Footnote 1: (return)

"The success of a Russian Loan is not dearly purchased by a little effusion, which, after all, commits Russia to nothing." (See Cartoon "Turning the Tables," Sept. 26, 1891.)

A TERRIBLE THREAT.

Impatient Old Gentleman (to Female Post-Office Assistant, who is chatting pleasantly with an agreeable acquaintance). "LOOK HERE, YOUNG WOMAN, IF YOU DON'T GIVE ME MY CHANGE, CONFOUND IT, I'M HANGED IF I DON'T GO