You are here
قراءة كتاب De Turkey and De Law A Comedy in Three Acts
تنويه: تعرض هنا نبذة من اول ١٠ صفحات فقط من الكتاب الالكتروني، لقراءة الكتاب كاملا اضغط على الزر “اشتر الآن"
right and joins the spectators. A woman enters left with a market basket and goes on in the store. The checkers click on the board. A girl about twelve enters right and goes into the store and comes out with a stick of peppermint candy.
WALTER Naw you don't Hambo!—Don't you go in dere! Dats a trap—(pointing) come right here and you got him.
LIGE
Back dat man up (pointing) Hambo do he'll git et up.
(there is the noise of the checkers for a half minute then a general shout of triumph)
SPECTATORS
You got him now, Hambo! Clarke, he's sho got you.
CLARKE
(Chagrined) Aw, he aint done nothin! Jes' watch ME.
HAMBO
(Jeering) Yeah, gwan move! Ha! Ha! go head and move.
SPECTATORS
Aw, he got you, Bro. Mayor—might as well give up. He got you in de
Louisville loop.
CLARKE Give up what? He can't beat me? (peeved) de rest of y'all git from over me, whoopin and hollerin! I God, a man can't hear his ears.
(The men fall back revealing the players clearly)
HAMBO Aw, neb mind bout them, Joe, go head and move. You aint got but one move to make nohow—go head on and take it.
CLARKE (moving a checker) Aw, here.
HAMBO (triumphant) Now! watch me boys whut Ahm gonna do to him. Ahm gonna laff in notes, while Ah work on him. (he lifts a checker high in the air preparatory to the jump, laughing to the scale and counting each checker he jumps out loud) Do, sol, fa, me, la! One! (jumps a checker) la, sol, fa, me, do! Two! (jumps another) Do, re, fa, me, do, Three! Me, re, la, so, fa! Four! (the crowd is roaring with laughter) Sol, fa, me, la, sol, do! Five! Ha! Ha! boys I got [Note: "the" x-ed out] de ole tush hawg! I got him in de go-long. (He slaps his leg and accidently knocks the board off his knee and spills the checkers.)
CLARKE Too bad you done dat, Hambo, cause Ah was gointer beat you at dat (he rises and starts towards the door of the store as the crowd roars in laughter)
HAMBO
You mean you was gointer beat me to de door, not a game Of checkers.
Ah done run de ole coon in his hole.
LIGE Well, Hambo, you done got to be so hard at checkers, come on less see whut you can do wid de cards. (He pulls out a soiled deck from his coat pocket and moves toward the bench at the left of the porch) You take Lum and me and Walter will wear you out.
HAMBO
You know I don't play no cards.
LUM
We aint playin for no money, just a lil Florida flip.
HAMBO Y'all can't play no Florida flip. 'Fore Ah joined de church there wasn't a man in de state could beat me wid de cards. But Ahm a deacon now, in Macedonia Baptist—Ah don't bother wid de cards no mo". (He and Joe Lindsay go inside store)
LIGE
Well, come on Lum. Walter, git yo'self a partner.
WALTER
(Looking about) Taint nobody to git (looks off right) Here come Dave
Carter.
LIGE You can't do nothin wid him dese days. He useter choose a game of cards when he wasn't out huntin, but now when he ain't out huntin varmints he's huntin' Daisy Blunt. (Enter Dave right with a shot-gun slung over his shoulder.)
WALTER Come on, fish, lemme bend a five-up over yo' head. You looks just like my meat.
DAVE Ahm on mah way to kill me a turkey gobbler, but if you and Lum thinks y'all's tush hawgs Ah'll stop long enough to take you down a button-hole lower. (He sets his gun down and finds a seat and draws it up to the card table)
WALTER Naw, Dave, we aint going to fool wid no button-holes we gointer tear off de whole piece dat de button-holes is in. (They all get set) All right boys, turn it on and let de bad luck happen.
LIGE
(Probbing the deck) My deal.
WALTER Watch yo'self Dave, don't get to worryin bout Daisy and let 'em ketch yo' jack.
LUM
(Winking) What you reckon he gointer be worryin' bout Daisy for? Dot's
Jim's gal.
DAVE Air Lawd, a heap sees but a few knows. Deal de cards man—you shufflin' a mighty lot.
WALTER
Sho is—must be tryin' to carry de cut to us.
LIGE Aw, we ain't gonna cheat you, we gonna beat you. (He slams down the cards for Dave to cut) Wanna cut 'em?
DAVE
Nope. Taint no use cuttin' a rabbit out when you kin twist him out.
Deal 'em! (Lige deals and turns up Jack of spades.)
WALTER
Yee-ee! Did you snatch dat Jack?
LIGE
Man, you know I ain't snatched no Jack. Whut you doin'?
WALTER
I'm beggin!
LIGE
Go ahead and tell 'em I sent you.
WALTER Play just like ahm in New York, partner. (scratches his head) We oughter try to ketch dat Jack.
LIGE
Stick out yo' hand an' you'll draw back a nub.
WALTER
Whut you want me to play for you, partner?
DAVE
Play me a baby diamond.
(Walter plays, then Lum, then Dave)
LUM (Triumphant) Looka pardner, they doin all dat woofin on uh queen—sendin' women to do uh man's work. Watch me stomp her wid mah king (He slams his card down and collects the trick.) Now come un under dis ace! (They all play and he collects the trick.) Now whut you want me to play for you, pardner?
LIGE
How many times you seen de deck.
LUM
Twice
LIGE
Pull off wid yo' king.
(Lum plays the king of spades. All the others play.) Look at ole low pardner. Ah knowed ah wuz gointer ketch him! Come right back at 'em.
LUM (stands up and slams down the ace) Pack up, pardner. Ahm playin' mah knots, now all play now. Ho! Ho! Dere goes de queen'. De Jack's a gentleman! (Lige takes the Jack and sticks it up on his forehead in braggadocia.) Here comes de ten spot, pardner, ahm dumpin to yuh!
LIGE (as he plays the Jack) Everybody git up off it and dump. High, low, Jack, game and gone from de first four.
WALTER
Gimme dem cards! Y'all carried de cub to us dat time. (riffles the
cards elaborately) but de deal is in de high, tall house now. Dis is
Booker T Washington spreadin his mess. (offers cards to Lige) Cut?
LIGE
Yeah, cut 'em and shoot 'em. I'd cut behind mah ma. (He cuts and
Walter deals.)
WALTER
Well, whut sayin'?
LUM
I'm beggin.
WALTER
Get up off yo' knees. Youse dat one.
LIGE
Walter, you sho stacked dese cards.
WALTER Aw, stop cryin' and play, man. Youse too old to be hollerin' titty-mama.
LUM Dis ain't no hand, dis is a foot. What you want me to play for you partner?
LIGE Play yo' own hand partner—I ain't nobody. Lead yo' bosses. (He leads the ace of clubs. Play goes round to dealer and Walter takes the card off the deck and slams it down.)
WALTER Get up ol' deuce of diamonds and gallop off wid yo' load. Pardner, how many times you seen de deck?
DAVE
(Two times—(they make signals.)
WALTER Watch dis ol' queen. Less go! (He begins to sing—Dave joins in.) When yo' card gits lucky, oh pardner, you oughter be in a rollin' game. (He speaks.) Ha! Ha! Wash day and no soap! (He sticks