turn Thief, and steal your kind Affection,
And when I’ve got your Hearts, claim your protection:
You can’t convict me sure for such a crime,
Since neither Mare nor Lap-dog, I purloin:
While you Rob Ladies Bosoms every day, }
And filch their pretious Maiden-heads away; }
I’ll plead good nature for this Brat the Play: }
A Play that plagues no more the thread-bare Theme
Of powder’d Beaux, or tricks o’th’ Godly Dame,
But in your humours let’s ye all alone,
And not so much as Fools themselves runs down.
Our Author try’d his best, and Wisemen tell,
’Tis half well doing to endeavour well:
What tho’ his poor Allay runs not so fine;
Yet, let it pass as does our present Coin;
For wanting fairer Ore, and riches mould
He stamps in Brass, what others print in Gold:
Smile on him but this time, the next perhaps,
If he guess right he may deserve your Claps.

Dramatis Personæ.

SCENE London.

THE
CITY BRIDE:
OR, THE
Merry Cuckold.

ACT I. SCENE the I.

The Curtain draws up, and discovers several sitting at a Banquet. An Entertainment of Instrumental Musick, Compos'd by Signior Finger: Then a Song, set by Mr. John Eccles, and Sung by Young La Roche.

SONG.

Enter Friendly and Clara.

Friend. This is a Day of Mirth and Jollity my Clara.

Clara. ’Tis so, for such as can be merry, Mr. Friendly.

Friend. Why not for us my Love, we have a Noble President, and methinks shou’d Imitate (thrô Envy) this their happiness.

Clara. I am not of your Opinion.

Friend. Why not my Fair?

Clara. I’ll tell you, because I purpose not to Marry.

Fri. Prithee be serious, and reform that Thought: Think of my past Service, and judge by that my future; weigh all the respect I have paid you long, and ever lov’d you beyond my self.

Cla. I know your Weakness, and will reward it too.

Fri. I am sure you will, you must be kind; And can you think an Answer of this killing Nature, a just return for all my faithful Love?

Cla. As to that I have already said.

Fri. Oh speak, from whence this Coldness doth arise! Be at least so kind as to tell me that; Is it some late Disgust you have conceived of my Person; or rather your desire, (I fear) of some unworthier, happy Creature, base in the Attempt, as you unkind in thinking of a Change; if neither.

Cla. Be’t what it will, thus it is, and with this Answer pray rest satisfied; there is but one way ever to win me and draw me unto Marriage, which whosoever finds, ’tis like he may have me, if not, I am still my own.

Fri. Oh name it then! Thou dearest Treasure of my Life! my Soul! my All! I am in a maze of Extasie, to think there’s any means to gain you, and hope you’l be so kind to tell me how I may be happy.

Cla. I’ll retire a while; and with my self resolve what must be done, and in the end send you my Resolution.
[Exit Clara.

Fri. I’ll here expect it: What more can I desire, than now be satisfied and know my Dooom.

Enter Spruce and Mr. Venter.

Spru. How now Jack! What all alone Man?

Fri. No, for I have heard some say, Men are ne’re less alone, then when alone. The reason I suppose is this,