Fables in Slang

FABLES
IN
SLANG

by

GEORGE ADE

ILLUSTRATED

by

CLYDE J. NEWMAN

PUBLISHED BY
HERBERT S. STONE AND COMPANY CHICAGO & NEW YORK
MDCCCCI

COPYRIGHT, 1899, BY
HERBERT S. STONE & CO.

The Author and the Publishers wish to acknowledge the courtesy of Victor F. Lawson, Esq., in permitting the reissue of these Fables in book form, after their appearance in the columns of The Chicago Record.

SIXTY-EIGHTH THOUSAND

Table of Contents

The Fable of the Visitor Who Got a Lot for Three Dollars

The Fable of the Slim Girl Who Tried to Keep a Date that was Never Made

The Fable of the New York Person Who Gave the Stage Fright to Fostoria, Ohio

The Fable of the Kid Who Shifted His Ideal

The Fable of the Base Ball Fan Who Took the Only Known Cure

The Fable of the Good Fairy with the Lorgnette, and why She Got It Good

The Fable of the Unintentional Heroes of Centreville

The Fable of the Parents Who Tinkered with the Offspring

The Fable of How He Never Touched George

The Fable of the Preacher Who Flew His Kite, but not Because He Wished to Do So

The Fable of Handsome Jethro, Who was Simply Cut Out to be a Merchant

The Fable of Paducah's Favorite Comedians and the Mildewed Stunt

The Fable of Flora and Adolph and a Home Gone Wrong

The Fable of the Copper and the Jovial Undergrads

The Fable of the Professor Who Wanted to be Alone

The Fable of a Statesman Who Couldn't Make Good

The Fable of the Brash Drummer and the Peach Who Learned that There Were Others

The Fable of Sister Mae, Who Did as Well as Could Be Expected

The Fable of How the Fool-Killer Backed Out of a Contract

The Fable of the Caddy Who Hurt His Head while Thinking

The Fable of the Martyr Who Liked the Job

The Fable of the Bohemian Who had Hard Luck

The Fable of the Coming Champion Who was Delayed

The Fable of the Lawyer Who Brought in a Minority Report