will earn his income in six days. If he cannot, we must echo the remark made by a conscientious person at a meeting on the subject, and say, "Let him starve."

Mr. Punch strongly upholds the Lambeth Vestry in this business, and thinks their conduct quite worthy of the reputation they have so long borne. He is much displeased with the Colonel of Police, and hopes never to have to say, in Mr. Pope's words—

If Vestries will enforce Sabbatarianism, and if Alliances will totally deprive the weaker classes of the Refreshments of which they mostly make bad use, we shall raise the standard of national morals, and entirely efface the discontent which some persons believe is felt with national institutions.

Seasonable Sentiment.—May the Commission of Inquiry into the Megæra business get to the bottom of it!

HOROSCOPE FOR 1872.

With the aid of this ingenious little instrument, the horoscope, which is simple in construction, easily cleaned, and to be had of all respectable dealers throughout the kingdom in gold, silver, mother-of-pearl, ormolu, aluminium, and other suitable materials, a clear insight may be obtained, on a fine evening, into the more salient events of the year one thousand eight hundred and seventy-two.

The observations we have been enabled to make with one of these instruments (fitted with the patent self-acting forecaster) are so startling that, without loss of time, we hasten to lay them before the world, for the guidance and direction of reigning Sovereigns, Cabinet Ministers, School-Boards, Members of Parliament, Mayors, Magistrates, Mothers of Marriageable Daughters, Managers of Theatres, Newspaper Editors, Speculators, and others, who may be desirous to make their arrangements at once for the ensuing twelve months.

Parliament will meet early in February, a few days after it ceases to be legal to slaughter pheasants. It will be prorogued early in August, about the period when grouse-shooting becomes a lawful pastime.

The Home Secretary will withdraw several measures in the course of the Session.

The London School-Board, by the active interposition of its Beadles, will clear the streets of from ten to twenty children.

Australian meat will appear on the bill of fare at the Lord Mayor's banquets.

In the month of February a most serious astronomical occurrence will take place, one which ought to make a great noise in the world, and is likely to be attended with disastrous consequences to those who may be unfortunate enough to be on the spot—the full moon will fall on Saturday, the 24th.

There will be at least one new cookery-book published during the year.

Good port wine will become scarcer and dearer than ever.

The Chancellor of the Exchequer will, in his annual Budget, propose a tax upon one or more of the following articles:—calling cards, dolls, pins, perambulators, umbrellas, and wigs.

The Mines Regulation Bill will be brought before Parliament; also the Collier affair.

There will be a show (the first) of guinea-pigs, white mice, parrots, bullfinches, and squirrels at the Crystal Palace. The Duchess Of Launceston, Lady Ida Down, and the Honourable Mrs. Alfred Warblemore will act as Judges.

Several new animals will be added to the collection in the Zoological Gardens.

The jury in the Tichborne case will retire when the trial is concluded, and, after deliberating for several days, will return into Court late at night, and deliver their Verdict amidst breathless silence. The Lord Chief Baron will have a sleeping apartment fitted up in the Westminster Sessions House, that no time may be lost in calling him up to receive the verdict.

Several Colonial Bishops will return home.

An eye should be kept on the Pope, the Orleans Princes, the Irish Roman Catholic Bishops, the Publicans, the Republicans, the Spiritualists, the Ritualists, Sir Charles Dilke, Mr. Whalley, Mr. Butt, and Mr. Brock, the pyrotechnist, as they may all be expected to do extraordinary things.

An eminent Archdeacon of the Established Church, well known in the West of England, will conduct the services at Mr. Spurgeon's Tabernacle, and Mr. Spurgeon will exchange pulpits with him.

A new Opera will be brought out on the last night but two of the season.

There will be some failures in the City, and constant stoppages in the streets.

The British Public will remit large sums of money for the relief of the Chinese, and allow charitable institutions at home to languish for want of funds.

Mr. John Brown, Mr. Thomas Jones, Mr. William Robinson, Mr. James Thompson, Mr. Charles Jackson, and Mr. Henry Smith will contract matrimonial alliances after harvest.

The Gulf Stream will be heard of again, probably for the last time, the tendency of modern scientific investigation being to show up that bugbear as a humbug.

Mr. Disraeli will deliver an address de omnibus rebus et quibusdam aliis, at Glasgow at Easter, and on Cottage Cookery at Hughenden in the autumn.

Letters will be addressed to Mr. Gladstone demanding explanations from him as to his religion, his relations, his favourite poet, and his private account at his banker's.

Oysters will be sixpence apiece.

Spain will have one or two new Ministries.

The estimates will include a vote for the purchase of robes and a wig for the new Speaker.