PUNCH,
OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

Vol. 62.

January 27, 1872.

THE LIQUOR CONTROVERSY.

'Spectable Citizen. "Ish my Opi'ion thish P'missive Bill 'sh Vexash'ious Measure. (Hic!) Why should I be D'prived of Nesh-sh-ary R'freshment, 'cause another Party hasn't—can't—doesn't—know when he'sh had enough? Shtan' up, Ol' Man!!!"

A JINGLE FOR ST. JAMES'S.

(By a Musical Enthusiast.)

TRUE BILL?

Much ingenuity has been expended in trying to prove that Shakspeare was a lawyer, and, amongst other passages in his writings, the two first lines of the Sonnet which commences—

may be thought to indicate that he possessed legal acquirements. Has it, however, occurred to the editors and commentators, that these lines are capable of another interpretation, and may be considered to add a new item to our scanty knowledge of Shakspeare's personal history, if we take the more probable view, that when he penned them he had in his mind's eye those familiar Tribunals—the Quarter Sessions—to which, it may be whilst residing in the Metropolis, but most undoubtedly after his retirement to Stratford, he would be summoned in the capacity of Grand Juryman?

SOUP AND SERMON.

The Morning Post records an interesting case of—

"Supper To Convicted Felons.—On Tuesday evening a supper was given to one hundred and fifty convicted felons by Ned Wright, the well-known converted burglar, at the Mission Hall, Hales Street, High Street, Deptford. The candidates for tickets of admission were compelled to attend the night before the supper and give an account of themselves to prove that they really were convicted felons, and by the sharp and close questioning of Mr. Wright, about fifty were refused tickets as impostors."

The fifty impostors who were fain to palm themselves off as convicts for the sake of a supper, must have been poor knaves indeed. These supernumeraries, for whom there was no seat at the table of Society, constitute a spectacle on the stage of life which it may be painful to some people and pleasant to others to contemplate from the dress circle. It is too probable that this Capital contains very many more of these Esaus, as they might be called if they had anything of a character so valuable as a birthright to dispose of on Esau's terms, with the small extras undermentioned:—

"The recipients of this Charity were a very motley crew, and ranged in years from six up to fifty. They were each served with a quantity of soup and a bag containing bread and a bun, after which Mr. Wright addressed them in his own peculiar manner, being listened to with marked attention."

Mr. Wright, we may suppose, took care to preach in a "tongue understanded of the people" who constituted his hearers, and accordingly delivered a considerable portion of his discourse in the language which our great-grandfathers called thieves' Latin. A sermon in slang, however, would, perhaps, be more curious than edifying. Let us hope that Mr. Wright's may possibly have had the effect of converting the guests who would once have been his pals from the error of their ways, formerly his own. Such, at least, appears to have been his laudable intention:—

"A large number of ladies and gentlemen interested in such work attended and gave the benefit of their advice and co-operation. In the course of the evening Mr. Wright announced his intention of taking under his patronage a number of the boys then present, who might be desirous of earning an honest livelihood, and furnishing them with money and clothes to make a fair start in life."

It would rejoice both ourselves and our benevolent readers to know that the acceptance of this offer by a considerable number of Mr. Wright's young friends may be the commencement of a career of good living, wherein they will very soon attain to better fare than a quantity of soup, a bag of bread, and a bun, quite good enough as that is for convicted felons, besides being peculiarly suitable as precluding any necessity for knives and forks chained to the table.

Lawyers and Lunatics.

How hardly will Judges, for the most part, admit the plea of insanity in exculpation from a charge of murder! How readily are they wont to entertain it as a reason for setting aside a will! How right they are in either instance! Suppose a maniac is hanged as a man of sound mind, his execution serves just as well, for the purpose of example, as it would if he were. But my Luds would make a mistake on the wrong side by misdirecting Jurors to determine insanity to have been sanity in a case wherein a lunatic might possibly have misdisposed of property.

Serious Affair.

A most determined act of self-inflicted torture has recently caused a considerable sensation in a fashionable quarter of Town. A lady, young, lovely, and accomplished, with troops of friends, and all that makes life enjoyable at her command, was detected deliberately "screwing up" her face!

EXTRACTS FROM THE DIARY OF THE COMING WOMAN.

O the Temple of Untrammelled Thought.

Sunday, May 10, 1882. Heard a transcendent oration from Althea Duxmore on "Dogmas and Dogmatics." Bi-monthly levy for the expenses of the Temple. Stephanotis Hewleigh and I the eleemosynars who collected in the new Septentrional Vestibule, where the men are put. Their united contributions amounted exactly to half a Victoria! Several dimes in the salver. The new Act, limiting the personal expenses of Adult