by the wall and hear every word! And to think you never once suspected that I came there to meet Percinet—

PASQUINOT. [Ironically] Ah, I—

SYLVETTE. We came every day at the same hour. [To BERGAMIN] Ha, ha, I can still hear Percinet telling you that he was going to marry—"most romantically"! And he kept his word!

BERGAMIN. [Put out] Really? And do you think that if I had wished—?

SYLVETTE. Now, now, now! I know lovers' dreams are always realized, and that fathers who are mortal enemies always end by falling into each other's arms.

PASQUINOT. Oh, let me laugh!

SYLVETTE. But we proved it!

BERGAMIN. I could say something—

SYLVETTE. What?

BERGAMIN. Nothing!

SYLVETTE. [To BERGAMIN] You seem changed. What do you mean?

BERGAMIN. I mean—

PASQUINOT. Why, with one word, we could— [Aside] I can't tell her! [He walks up-stage two or three steps.]

SYLVETTE. Well, if you have nothing to say, why not keep still?

PASQUINOT. [Angrily] Keep still? Nothing to say? Do you imagine that everything just happened? How do you think people could come into my park through the iron gates?

BERGAMIN. Do you imagine for one instant that young ladies are carried off like that nowadays?

SYLVETTE. Do I—? What are you saying?

BERGAMIN. That will do! It is high time you knew the truth. I tell you, the victory was on the side of the old men!

SYLVETTE. But—

PASQUINOT. In old plays the father was always the dupe. Nowadays, we do the duping! Would either of you have loved the other if you had been told to do so? No.

SYLVETTE. Then perhaps you suspected—?

PASQUINOT. Of course we did.

SYLVETTE. Our meetings?

BERGAMIN. I heard you every time!

SYLVETTE. But the benches?

PASQUINOT. We put them there on purpose.

SYLVETTE. The duel?

BERGAMIN. A trick—prepared beforehand.

SYLVETTE. The bravadoes?

PASQUINOT. Actors!

SYLVETTE. Then my abduction—? It was all a joke!

BERGAMIN. [Searching in his pocket] Joke? Here's the bill!

SYLVETTE. [Snatching the bill from him] Give it to me! [She reads] "Straforel, Confidential affairs: One abduction, setting and scenery—for purposes of bringing about a marriage—" Oh! "Eight assistants at five francs a head; eight masks—"

BERGAMIN. [To PASQUINOT] I think we told her too soon!

SYLVETTE. [Continuing] "One sedan-chair, with porters; latest style, with red trimmings—" [Laughing, she throws the bill on the table.]

PASQUINOT. Then she isn't angry?

SYLVETTE. [Graciously] A charming idea! But, truly, Monsieur
Bergamin, do you think I love Percinet merely because of your trick?

PASQUINOT. She takes it very well.

BERGAMIN. [To SYLVETTE] You're not offended?

PASQUINOT. Are you going to tell Percinet?

SYLVETTE. Oh, no. Men are so stupid!

BERGAMIN. Very sensible. But I had an idea— [Taking out his watch] Now we must see about the contract. [Offering his hand to SYLVETTE] We are still good friends?

SYLVETTE. Of course!

BERGAMIN. [Turning about once more before he goes out] You don't blame me, do you?

SYLVETTE. [Sweetly] Not in the least! [BERGAMIN and PASQUINOT go out. As they leave, SYLVETTE bursts into a rage.] How I hate that Monsieur Bergamin!

[Enter PERCINET.]

PERCINET. Still here? Ah, I see; you did not want to leave this sacred spot—

SYLVETTE. [Sitting on the bench to the left] Outrageous!

PERCINET. There is where you saw me, like Amadis, put to flight thirty of the ruffians!

SYLVETTE. No: ten!

PERCINET. [Going to her] Dearest, what is the matter? Are you troubled? Your eyes are not so bright as they were. I know! This marvelous place makes you sad sometimes. Are you sad because our balcony—our Verona balcony—is destroyed?

SYLVETTE. [Impatiently] Oh, dear!

PERCINET. But does not the wall still exist in our memories? That wall which cradled our love—

SYLVETTE. [Aside:] Will he never end!

PERCINET. You remember not long ago, you said our story should be put into a poem?

SYLVETTE. Yes?

PERCINET. Well, I have occasionally written verses.

SYLVETTE. Are you going to write our story?

PERCINET. Listen to this; I thought it out when I was walking.
"The Fathers who are Mortal Enemies." First canto—

SYLVETTE. Oh!

PERCINET. [Ready to declaim] Er—

SYLVETTE. Oh!

PERCINET. What is the matter?

SYLVETTE. I imagine I am too happy—I'm nervous—I don't feel well. [She bursts into tears.] I'll be well in a moment. Let me be! [She turns her back and hides her face in a handkerchief.]

PERCINET. [Surprised] I'll leave you for a moment. [Aside] On a day like this, it's only too natural— [He goes to the right, sees the bill on the table, takes a pencil from his pocket, and sits down.] I'll just jot down those lines. [He picks up the bill, and starts to write; notices the writing and reads aloud] "I, Straforel, having pretended to be killed by a sword-thrust from a foolish young blade, hereby render account for torn clothes and wounded pride: forty francs." [Smiling] What is it? [He continues reading to himself, and his smile dies away.]

SYLVETTE. [Wiping her eyes] He would fall from the clouds if he knew! I must be careful!

PERCINET. [Rising] Well, well, well!

SYLVETTE. [Going toward him] What is it?

PERCINET. [Hiding the bill] Nothing. [Aside] Now I see why the body was never found!

SYLVETTE. [Turning around to show PERCINET her dress] You've said nothing about my dress to-day?

PERCINET. [Preoccupied] Blue is not becoming. I always prefer you in pink.

SYLVETTE. [Aside] What is the matter? Can he have found out?
[She looks toward the table.] The bill? [She runs to the table.]

PERCINET. What are you looking for?

SYLVETTE. Nothing.—Now let me hear your poem.

PERCINET. No.

SYLVETTE. Please!

PERCINET. No.

SYLVETTE. But I want to hear it.

PERCINET. The verses are not good.

SYLVETTE. Oh! [Aside] I think he knows!

PERCINET. [Aside] I think she knows!

BOTH. [Each to the other] You know!? [After a pause, they laugh.] Ha, ha, ha!

PERCINET. Isn't it funny?

SYLVETTE. Very.

PERCINET. We were made to play a farce—our fathers were the best of friends all the time!

SYLVETTE. Good neighbors.

PERCINET. I'll warrant they are cousins, too!

SYLVETTE. [Bowing] I am about to marry my cousin!

PERCINET. My cousin!