away.

Lord Finchley

Lord Finchley tried to mend the Electric Light
Himself.

It struck him dead: And serve him right!
It is the business of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan.

Lord Ali-Baba

Lord Ali-Baba was a Turk
Who hated every kind of work,
And would repose for hours at ease
With

Houris seated on his knees.
A happy life!—Until, one day

Mossoo Alphonse Effendi Bey
(A Younger Turk: the very cream
And essence of the New Regime)
Dispelled this Oriental dream
By granting him a place at Court,
High Coffee-grinder to the Porte,
Unpaid:—

In which exalted Post
His Lordship yielded up the ghost.

Lord Hippo

Lord Hippo suffered fearful loss

By putting money on a horse
Which he believed, if it were pressed,
Would run far faster than the rest:
For
someone who was in the know

Had confidently told him so.

But

on the morning of the race
It only took

the seventh place!

Picture the Viscount's great surprise!
He scarcely could believe his eyes!
He sought the Individual who
Had laid him odds at 9 to 2,
Suggesting as a useful tip
That they should enter Partnership
And put to joint account the debt
Arising from his foolish bet.

But when the Bookie—oh! my word,
I only wish you could have heard
The way he roared he did not think,
And hoped that they might strike him pink!
Lord Hippo simply turned and ran
From this infuriated man.
Despairing, maddened and distraught
He utterly collapsed and sought
His sire,