قراءة كتاب Mr. Punch on the Warpath: Humours of the Army, the Navy and the Reserve Forces
تنويه: تعرض هنا نبذة من اول ١٠ صفحات فقط من الكتاب الالكتروني، لقراءة الكتاب كاملا اضغط على الزر “اشتر الآن"
Mr. Punch on the Warpath: Humours of the Army, the Navy and the Reserve Forces
the trigger. This plan would leave only seven men out of ten unemployed.
5. The above-named seven would be at liberty to throw things at the enemy whilst awaiting their turn for the rifle.
6. In actual warfare, the commanding officer may request the enemy to wait a reasonable time whilst the solitary rifle is handed round, after being fired off.
7. Whilst an attack is going on, the unemployed men of a company shall not be allowed to leave the ranks to play, but should be encouraged to take an intelligent interest in the shooting prowess of their solitary comrade.
North Cork Militia Man. "Am I to shalute him, or no? Begor. I wondher if he's a sarvan'-man or a giniral."
The Imperial Yeomanry.
Recruit. "Look 'ere, mister, it ain't no good. This saddle won't go on this 'ere 'orse. I got it over is 'ead all right, but I can't get 'is legs through nohow!"
THE NECESSARY KIT
["A housewife will now form part of the free kit of necessaries."—Army Order.]
It 'as long been my opinion, as a sodger and a man,
That I couldn't get on proper, not without yer, Sairey Ann.
Well, now 'ere's the latest horder—just yer take a read of it—
That a housewife shall be a portion of the necessary kit.
Oh, them horders! Ain't I cussed 'em! Oh, the shockin' words I've said!
But now for once, my Sairey, I'm a-blessin' 'em instead.
Yus, they misses pretty horfen, but at last they've made a hit,
For yer going to be a portion of my necessary kit.
They're to serve out housewifes gratis, an' I only 'opes, my pet,
That they'll let us Tommies choose ourselves the gals we wants to get,
'Twould be takin' of the gildin' off the gingerbread a bit
If I got yer mar, for instance, in my necessary kit.
But we'll 'ope the best, my Sairey, though yer can't for certain tell,
And I ain't got much opinion of them parties in Pall Mall,
But for once they've put a bullet in the bull's eye, I'll admit,
If they makes my Sairey portion of my necessary kit.
Boatswain (to newly-joined cadet). "Come, my little man, you mustn't cry on board of one of His Majesty's ships of war. Did your mother cry when you left?"
Cadet. "Yes, sir."
Boatswain. "Silly old woman! And did your sister cry?"
Cadet. "Yes, sir."
Boatswain. "Stupid little thing! And did your father cry?"
Cadet. "No, sir."
