THE CRUST: but before I forget it; the DOVER incident is closed: THE PASSENGER FROM CALAIS has been CAPTURED and THE CAREER OF KATHERINE BUSH has been brought to a close: always hate to run down THE WEAKER SEX, but QUICK ACTION was necessary. We are going to Ratcliffe, your Grace, and I have The Yard's Rolls-Royce below, and if you have no objection, we'll make a start. I have taken the PRECAUTION to bring THE SCARLET RUNNER, as we call it; pretty heavy car, but greater SECURITY; LIGHT MOTOR CARS AND VOITURETTES are no good for rough roads."

"JERRY," said Morgan, as they reached the curb, "GO-AHEAD, don't be a 'FRAID CAT, High street, Ratcliffe."

It took but a moment to get FROM LOW TO HIGH GEAR: through Hobart Place, into VICTORIA Street, across New Palace Yard, and on to the Embankment.

"Give this motor HALF A CHANCE," said Morgan, "and you are GOING SOME: Does your Grace see the man AT THE CROSS ROADS? that's MY FRIEND PROSPERO: he has been connected with more CELEBRATED CRIMES than any man at the Yard."

On HIGH SPEED, THE SCARLET CAR rushed past The Metropole, under Charing Cross bridge, past The Needle and the imposing facade of SOMERSET HOUSE: across Blackfriars entrance, and then into EARLY LONDON. "BREAKERS AHEAD," called Morgan, "Jerry: careful of the mud." There really wasn't any mud, only CITY DUST, but the sentence had to be interpolated here in order to give a REASON for the next question.

"I don't suppose your Grace is interested in ROAD MATERIALS? Last year, MY SON AND I made A STUDY OF SPLASHES."

The motor continued on its CROOKED WAY through Upper and Lower THAMES streets, past THE TOWER OF LONDON, over THE BROKEN ROAD of Lower Shadwell.

"Your Grace, I venture to say, A BIT OF ROUGH ROAD."

"Very, Morgan, but good for OUR DIGESTION, but THESE SHIFTING SCENES are rather disconcerting."

The motor was stopped at Love Lane, where the party was met by POLICEMAN BLUE JAY, who accompanied them to the THAMES Wharf, BEYOND the No. 3 shaft of Rotherhithe Tunnel.

"Inspector," said THE PILOT, "here's A STROKE OF LUCK; this is no WILD GOOSE CHASE; your trip is not IN VAIN; you're JUST IN TIME, for the boat is still at ANCHOR."

"WHAT SHALL WE DO NOW?" asked the Duke, not KNOWING, OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS.

And Morgan, pointing through THE PURPLE MISTS, to the SURREY side, for the early DAWN was upon them, said:

"We have now reached THE END OF THE JOURNEY: do you see the ship in MIDSTREAM off the Surrey Locks, in front of the gas tanks? That's our destination: the DEAR ENEMY."

"But, Morgan, for THE LIFE OF ME, I fail to see where I come in."

"All in good time, your Grace: IT'S ALL IN A DAY'S WORK: again I say, don't WORRY: but I see the EBB-TIDE is on," and blowing two blasts upon a whistle, the Police-Boat, THE SEAWOLF, shot through THE OUTLET from Shadwell Basin, where she was always HELD FOR ORDERS.

"Be careful, your Grace: get away, ANTONIO: THE BLACK BARQUE, you know: and when we get aboard, all be careful of the OPEN HATCHWAYS."

And IN ANOTHER MOMENT, Morgan, standing in the bow, shouted "Ship Ahoy: IN THE KING'S NAME, I want the captain of THE QUEEN OF THE NIGHT," after which they began climbing UP THE LADDER.

(A fight occurs here, a description of which has been omitted as it contains some BLANKETY BLANK VERSE.)

"And now, my worthy CAP'N GID, cut out the SMILES: THE GAME is up: the POPULATION of your HAPPY SHIP has dropped one; we have secured two prisoners and if you don't want to be the third, COME down, and besides, BY WHAT AUTHORITY are you SAILING, UNDER TWO FLAGS: IN SPITE OF ALL the WHITE LIES you have told us, you have A YOUNG LADY aboard and we propose to have THE GIRL: WORDS TO THE WISE, you know. I admit that you have been A VICTIM OF VILLAINY, but you are playing A DESPERATE GAME, and THE RECKONING is at hand. Where is THE HIDDEN VICTIM? what, may I ask, have you over there IN GRANDMA'S CHEST, there in THE SHADOW, UNDER THE RED ROBE? Put down that gun: anyway I can see it is not THE REAL THING."

(A fight occurs here, a description of which has been omitted, as there was some PISTOL AND REVOLVER SHOOTING.)

"My CAPTAIN with the FAIRY TALES, THE CONFLICT is over; THE DAY'S WORK is finished; as a FIGHTER, you're a monumental failure: go buy a scrap-book, and learn how to become a prize-fighter, and as to SHOOTING FIRE-ARMS like WILD FIRE, it was simply FURTHER FOOLISHNESS; but FOR THE LOVE OF TONITA, come off your PIRATE BRIDGE; pull up, and remember IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO MEND: no more MONKEY SHINES: this HAPPY-GO-LUCKY business has been EASY MONEY to you, you with THE ITCHING PALM; but it is really not one of the THINGS WORTH DOING, and IT NEVER CAN HAPPEN AGAIN: I PROMISE to let you off, and these are no IDLE WORDS, for you have been THE DUPE, and I WISH YOU JOY in your FREEDOM, but OH! MARY BE CAREFUL, hereafter. And NOW, my MAN, draw up at the ROYAL ALBERT Dock."

"EXCUSE ME, MY LORD DUKE," said Morgan, "I think instead of awaiting the return of the motor, THE MORE EXCELLENT WAY will be to begin THE HOMEWARD JOURNEY, by taking a tram here for West Ham, and then the District to THE WEST END, THE LAND OF MAKE BELIEVE."

"GO-AHEAD BOYS: FOLLOW ME, your Grace," and carrying the still LIMPY figure of the RELEASED girl, the party crossed the road.

VIII: THE GRAND FINALE.

The Duke of Belleville had just finished going through his morning's post, and still held in his HAND a lengthy letter from his financial adviser, RICHARD ELLIOTT, FINANCIER, THE MONEY MASTER dealing with THE FINANCES OF SIR JOHN KYNNERSLY, one of THE BOOMERS of the day, and with THE CONTEST FOR SOUND MONEY. The Duke was, at the moment, reclining rather lazily, with his TWO LEGS outstretched, and was thinking, neither of the contents of THE LETTERS, nor of WHAT TO WEAR, but listening rather, as THE MUSIC LOVER, to THE SONG OF SONGS, THE SONG OF THE CARDINAL, perched upon THE ELM TREE ON THE MALL.

Oh! What is there to equal a SPRING IN LONDON?

This, the Duke's favorite room, was at once the admiration of the artistic, containing, as it did, wonderful examples of THE CHIPPENDALES, and FRAGMENTS OF OLD FURNITURE, collected by HIS OWN PEOPLE, his very own ANCESTORS: the room, too, was an historic one; many A PRINCESS OF INTRIGUE had occupied that very chair, and the GHOSTS OF PICCADILLY had met there on more than one occasion, for every house must have a GHOST, even if it be JUST FOR FUN.

THE BRONZE BELL of distant Big Ben had just proclaimed the hour of noon, when Inspector Morgan was announced.

"AT LAST," said the Duke to himself, "THE REVELATIONS OF INSPECTOR MORGAN."

"THE TOP OF THE MORNING to your Grace: I am here, as you see, AT THE TIME APPOINTED: I trust your Grace is well, after the ORDEAL BY FIRE last night? I am A COURIER OF FORTUNE. RECORD NO. 33 is now complete."

"I AM WELL, Morgan: but out with THE GREAT SECRET: I take it that THE WELDING of the chain is complete: that THE GREAT PLAN has been successful: but allow me to suggest that you are not FRANKS DUELLIST, so for goodness sake, stop bending THE SILVER BLADE of that knife: it is not a rapier, as you seem to imagine, and I am afraid you will break it: it really belongs IN THE KITCHEN."

"MY STORY, your Grace, is rather long, and in a manner proves that there has been MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING: but before I begin, let me say that Sir Jaffray was FOUND DEAD this MORNING: of course it was DRINK that killed him: I fancy that lets your cousin, HER LADYSHIP, out of a bad bargain: THE MESSAGE, BY TELEPHONE from Broadstairs stated further that Sir Jaffray and THREE COMRADES were BOXING and drinking quantities of BAD WHISKEY at BAR-20 of THE FLYING INN, and à propos were discussing the ART OF AVIATION, and FLIGHT WITHOUT FORMULAE, which only added FUEL to THE FLAME, and became so noisy, that THE MASTER OF THE INN threw them OUTDOORS: but to RETURN;