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COUNSELOR— Duty before pleasure. I always keep my duty before my eyes.
When I went to the Alton, a very young man, Said I to myself, said I, I'll work on a new and original plan, Said I to myself, said I. I'll never assume that a road is O. K., That it's perfect, in fact, like the C. and the A., Till I've tried it my own and particular way, Said I to myself, said I.
I'll never throw dust in a passenger's eyes, Said I to myself, said I, Recommending a road with buncombe and lies, Said I to myself, said I, Or pretend that some other roads of which we read Can equal the Alton for comfort and speed, Or supply all the luxuries travelers need, Said I to myself, said I.
Ere I boast of the road, I will travel it through, Said I to myself, said I, And see that its officers do what they can do, Said I to myself, said I. So I went on the road from the first to the last, I travel'd with pleasure so safe and so fast, That I said, such a road can ne'er be surpass'd, Said I to myself, said I.
On all other roads by which men may go, Said I to myself, said I, They're none of them safe, and they're all of them slow, Said I to myself, said I.
The Chicago and Alton must still be A 1, For business, for pleasure, for health, or for fun, Or it never could have such a character won, Said I to myself, said I.
(This being rather a difficult song to sing, the Counselor, in reply to the deafening encore which he receives, will hand to each person in the audience a copy of the Langtry Map, a book of the Patience Parody, a copy of the Chicago News-Letter, and a folder of the Alton Road. Exit Counselor, with a skip.)
STREPHON—It's too bad to be taken from Phyllis just when she was my own.
(Enter Iolanthe.)
IOLANTHE—What, my son in tears upon his wedding-day!
STREPHON—The Counselor, who is Phyllis's guardian, separates us forever.
IOLANTHE— Oh, if he only knew—— No matter. The Queen of our road and its fairies shall protect you. See, here they come. (Enter Fairies.)
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