joke with another as good, and then consider yourself on our staff. Lead us to our apartments, CHARLES."

And so, looking from his pleasant Fifth Avenue windows, PUNCHINELLO waves a salutation to his audience with a "May you be happy, each and all of you, and live all your days in clover," (admission ten cents.)

PUNCHINELLO'S NEW CHARTER.

THE GREAT PLATFORM OF THE RINGS.

The Lions and the Lambs lie down together,
While the "Sun" stands still.

The People of the State of New-York, represented by PUNCHINELLO and his troop of admirers, hereby enact:

§ 1. All the offices now provided by law with within the City and County of New-York, shall be put in a grand grab-bag;

§ 2. It shall be the duty of the Commissioners of the Central Park to devote said Park, on the Fourth day of July next, to the erection of poles (or polls) for the purpose of enabling voters to grab from the grab-bag.

§ 3. HORACE GREELEY, PETER COOPER, the Rev. Dr. THOMPSON, DANIEL DREW, and REDDY THE BLACKSMITH, are hereby constituted Inspectors and Canvassers for the grabbers.

§ 4. It shall be the duty of the said inspectors to prepare a registry-list of all the persons intending to grab, who are required to serve a notice of intention through the post-office upon REDDY THE BLACKSMITH, the Chairman. DANIEL DREW is to provide funds wherewith to pay the postage.

§ 5. The registry-list shall be alphabetically prepared, and the number of chances shall be determined by dividing the number of grabbers by the number of offices.

§ 6. The grabbers shall be selected by lot.

§ 7. The lots shall be drawn by REDDY THE BLACKSMITH from his own hat, his eyes wide open, while every other inspector, and the voters, shall be blindfolded with newspapers from the files of the Christian Union; whereupon, as the names of the fortunate grabbers are called, each one shall proceed to the grab-bag and grab his office.

§ 8. There shall be no repeaters of the process.

§ 9. The persons thus grabbing offices shall be then and there, by the Inspectors, declared duly elected to the offices grabbed, for life.

§ 10. Any vacancy occurring by assassination shall be immediately filled by the Inspectors appointing the assassin.

§ 11. Every person owning real estate on the Island shall contribute one ninety-ninth part of his income to the said grab-bag. On the following Christmas, in the presence of the grab income-bents of offices, the Inspectors shall proceed to divide the proceeds of these taxable contributions, and one half of these proceeds shall be equally divided among the grab income-bents of offices. The other half shall be devoted to paving every conceivable surface of the city with wooden pavement.

§ 12. Owners of real estate in the city of New York are hereby allowed to make their own arrangements with the gas companies for the supply of light; but nothing herein shall be construed to devote any part of the proceeds to light the public streets at night and real estate owners shall be allowed to make their own arrangements for the supply of water with the grab income-bents of the Croton Grab Board.

§ 13. The sewers of the city shall be converted to burial places for persons assassinated at political meetings.

§ 14. Nothing herein contained shall be so construed as to permit any judge to grant an injunction against any grabbers of the offices.

§ 15. The "dead-beats," heretofore known as policemen and soldiers of the first division, are hereby legislated out of office, and it shall be a felony punishable with assassination for any one to go unarmed with a six-shooter.

§ 16. All provisions of the United States or State constitutions inconsistent with the above provisions are hereby repealed.

From Gertrude of Wyoming.

Because a jury-mast is a makeshift for a lost spar, it does not follow that a jury-woman is a make-shift for any body. In fact, the women who sit upon juries are not the sort of women who personally supply the family linen.

SURE TO BE LOST AT C.—Signor LEFRANC's voice, if he continues to recklessly strain it with his chest C.

HINTS FOR THE FAMILY.

As it is intended that the mission of PUNCHINELLO shall be extended into all circles of society, that of the family shall not be neglected. Every other weekly journal abounds in wise domestic counsels, apt recipes, cunning plans, and helpful patterns of all sorts; and PUNCHINELLO, intending to offer the most advantages, expects to become so necessary to the economical housewife and the prudent bread-winner that no family will be able to do without him. So, with no further prologue, we will present our readers with some valuable hints in regard to the use that can be made of things that often lie about the house gathering dust—idle clutter and of no service to any body. The first hint, we know, if followed up, will be found of the greatest advantage to all, yielding great measure of convenience at little cost. Take a wide board—as wide as you can get it—and as long as it will cut without cracks or knotholes, and saw the ends off square. Then bore four large holes in the corners, and insert the ends of four sticks, each about three feet long. Place it upon the floor, so that the board will be supported by the sticks, thus:

This contrivance will be found very useful for various purposes. It will do to put books upon, to write upon, to iron clothes upon, and for any other purpose where it is considered desirable to support household objects at a distance from the floor. One of its chief advantages is to serve as a receptacle for the food of a family during meals. If on such occasions it be covered with a white linen or cotton cloth, its appearance will be much improved, and in time it can not fail to become a favorite article of furniture.

The next hint will please the ladies. Take two pieces of cotton or woolen cloth, of any size from two inches to a foot square, and sew them together at the edges, leaving, however, a small place unsewed at one corner. You will now find that you have something like a square bag. This is to be tightly filled with wool, bran, mowings, clippings of human hair, or something of the kind, and the open corner is then to be sewed up. When finished, the affair will assume this appearance and will be found very useful for the preservation of pins. The manner of using it is as follows: you take the pin in the hand and firmly press it into the bag, when it will be found that the body of the pin will easily enter, but that the head will prevent its entire disappearance. The stuffing of the bag will retain the pin in its position until a slight degree of force is used to withdraw it. With the use of this ingenious little contrivance, pins can be kept in safety with the points always hidden and their heads exposed to view. It will be found much more economical and convenient than the plan of carrying pins loose in the pocket, and eventually will be generally adopted, we think. The top and corners can be ornamented à discrétion.

Hint the third is especially addressed to country families. Take one of the ordinary toilet-tables that are to be found in so many rural habitations, and, on removing the white cover, you will probably find that the table is formed of an empty flour-barrel with a board nailed on top of it. Remove this board;