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قراءة كتاب Humour of the North
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HUMOUR OF THE NORTH
THE BLUE NOSE
Let the Student of Nature in rapture descant,
On the Heaven's cerulean hue;
Let the Lover indulge in poetical rant,
When the eyes of his Mistress are blue.
But fill high your glasses—fill, fill to the brim,
I've a different toast to propose:
While such eyes, and such skies, still are beaming for him,
Here's a health to the jolly Blue Nose.
Let the Frenchman delight in his vine-covered vales,
Let the Greek toast his old classic ground;
Here's the land where the bracing Northwester prevails,
And where jolly Blue Noses abound.
Long—long may it flourish, to all of us dear,
Loved and honoured by hearts that are true;
But, should ever a foe chance his nose to show here
He shall find all our Noses true Blue.
TO MARY
Oh! blame me not, Mary, for gazing at you,
Nor suppose that my thoughts from the Preacher were straying,
Tho' I stole a few glances—believe me 'tis true—
They were sweet illustrations of what he was saying.
For, when he observed that Perfection was not
To be found upon Earth—for a moment I bent
A look upon you—and could swear on the spot
That perfection in Beauty was not what he meant.
And when, with emotion, the worthy Divine
On the doctrine of loving our neighbours insisted,
I felt, if their forms were as faultless as thine,
I could love every soul of them while I existed.
And Mary, I'm sure 'twas the fault of those eyes—
'Twas the lustre of them to the error gave birth—
That, while he spoke of Angels that dwelt in the Skies,
I was gazing with rapture at one upon Earth.
A TOAST
Here's a health to thee, Tom: a bright bumper we drain
To the friends that our bosoms hold dear,
As the bottle goes round, and again and again
We whisper, "We wish he were here."
Here's a health to thee, Tom: may the mists of this earth
Never shadow the light of that soul
Which so often has lent the mild flashes of mirth
To illumine the depths of the Bowl.
vWith a world full of beauty and fun for a theme,
And a glass of good wine to inspire,
E'en without thee we sometimes are bless'd with a gleam
That resembles thy spirit's own fire.
Yet still, in our gayest and merriest mood,
Our pleasures are tasteless and dim,
For the thoughts of the past and of Tom that intrude
Make us feel we're but happy with him.
Like the Triumph of old where the absent one threw
A cloud o'er the glorious scene,
Are our feasts, my dear Tom, when we meet without you,
And think of the nights that have been.
When thy genius, assuming all hues of delight
Fled away with the rapturous hours,
And when wisdom and wit, to enliven the night,
Scattered freely their fruits and their flowers.
When thy eloquence played round each topic in turn,
Shedding lustre and life where it fell,
As the sunlight, in which the tall mountain tops burn,
Paints each bud in the lowliest dell.
When that eye, before which the pale Senate once quailed
With humour and deviltry shone,
And the voice which the heart of the patriot hailed,
Had mirth in its every tone.
Then a health to thee, Tom: ev'ry bumper we drain
But renders thy image more dear,
As the bottle goes round, and again and again,
We wish, from our hearts, you were here.
SHEEPSKINS AND POLITICS
You know Uncle Tim; he was small, very small—not in stature, for he was a six-footer, but small in mind and small in heart; his soul was no bigger than a flea's. "Zeb, my boy," says he to me one day, "always be neuter in elections. You can't get nothing by them but ill-will. Dear, dear! I wish I had never voted. I never did but oncest, and, dear, dear! I wish I had let that alone. There was an army doctor oncest, Zeb, lived right opposite to me to Digby: dear, dear! he was a good friend to me. He was very fond of wether mutton; and, when he killed a sheep, he used to say to me, 'Friend Tim, I will give you the skin if you will accept it.' Dear, dear! what a lot of them he gave me, first and last! Well, oncest the doctor's son, Lawyer Williams, offered for the town, and so did my brother-in-law, Phin Tucker; and, dear, dear! I was in a proper fix. Well, the doctor axed me to vote for his son, and I just up and told him I would, only my relation was candidating also; but ginn him my hand and promise I would be neuter. Well, I told brother-in-law the same, that I'd vote for him with pleasure, only my old friend, the doctor's son, was offering too; and, therefore, gave him my word also, I'd be neuter. And, oh, dear, dear! neuter I would have remained too, if it hadn't a-been for them two electioneering generals—devils, I might say—Lory Scott and Terry Todd. Dear, dear! somehow or 'nother, they got hold of the story of the sheepskins, and they gave me no