And a Little Boy was terrible strong,
And he stretched ’em out to ’leven foot long!

I picked some Leaves from off a Tree,
And then I nearly Fainted:

For somehow it Astonished me
To find they’d All been Painted!

I never saw a PURPLE COW, I never HOPE to see one;

But I can tell you, anyhow, I’d rather SEE than BE one!

TN: Image was joined from a double page spread.

My House is made of Graham Bread,
Except the ceiling ’s made of White;

Of Angel Cake I make my Bed;
I eat my Pillow every night!

I’d rather have Fingers than Toes;

I’d rather have Ears than a Nose;

And as for my Hair,
I’m glad it’s all there,

I’ll be awfully sad when it goes!

Many People seem to Think
Plaster o’ Paris good to Drink:

Though conducive unto Quiet
I prefer another Diet!

O Willie an’ Wallie, you better believe,
They had a circus on Christmas Eve
With Huldy Ann an’ Pinkie Jane—
The folks imagined they’d went insane!
Them twins had an awfully narrow shave—
They nearly was killt, for they wouldn’t behave!
Huldy’s a winner! She hatched the scheme
On the day before Christmas; an’ that there team—
That Willie an’ Wallie—they worked like mad—
You’ve no idea what a time they had!
’Twas the day before Christmas, at half-past three,
When Huldy she up an’ she says, says she:
“You Willie an’ Wallie, you go in the yard
An’ get that windmill—it won’t be hard—
An’ bring it an’ put it on top of the house,
An’ don’t make no more noise than a mouse!
‘For I know something I won’t tell,
Nine little niggers in a peanut shell!’”
Well, the twins they knew when she said that,
Huldy wa’ n’t talkin’ much through her hat.
So they worked an’ they tugged for more ’n an hour,
’Till they got that windmill off’n the tower;
An’ they hauled it up to the roof with ropes,
Way on the ridgepole, ’tween the slopes.

They was almost dead, it tired ’em so,
An’ Will druv a splinter into his toe!
An’ all this time both Pinkie Jane
An’ Huldy was workin’ with might an’ main,
A-shuttin’ the doors, an’ the windows too,
An’ stoppin’ up cracks where the leaks come through.
An’ when it was tight, she slipped inside
An’ turned the gas on good an’ wide!
An’ she screamed, “Look out that you don’t get smothered:
Climb up on the roof where I won’t be bothered!”

When the house filled up with the gas inside,
It trembled an’ jiggled from side to side;
An’ when the gas filled it good an’ full
The ole foundations began to pull;
Then Huldy she pushed it a little mite,
An’ the house riz up in the air all right!
An’ it riz an’ riz like a ole balloon.
An’ Ann got aboard of it none too soon;
For it flew away off up into the sky
With her holdin’ on by her hands—Oh my!
But she clum on top, an’ you’d oughter have seen
Them workin’ that wheel like a flyin’ machine!
Well, after they’d flew an hour or so
They came to a mountain all covered with snow,
An’ there on the top they happened to see
A enermous great big Christmas tree!
Then Huldy steered ’em over the top,
An’ they let down an anchor to make ’em stop;
An’ Willie an’ Wallie they yelled with glee,
An’ jumped right into that Christmas tree!
They let down a ladder for them two girls
That didn’t darst jump for spoilin’ their curls!
They was toys an’ games an’ wagons an’ dolls,
All trimmed with tinsel an’ fol-de-rols!
For Santa Claus had just drove away,
An’ Wallie he said that he seen the sleigh!
Well, when they’d eat all the candy they could,
They loaded their house with things up good.
(But they hurried for fear that the old man’d come back
An’ catch ’em an’ give ’em a larrupin’ whack!)
Then they got on the roof, an’ they cut the string
An’ away they flew like everything!

The twins worked the wheel an’ Huldy steered,
An’ Pinkie clung tight—she was awfully skeered:
They got back home at half-past six,
But, oh! they got into a nawful fix!
For just as they sunk the house gave a lurch
An’ they landed right on top of a church!
An’ they punched a hole through the roof with the steeple,
To the great amazement of all of the people!
An’ the toys fell out of that house in the