when there was grate droves of Cattel and Sheep druv thro' the streets, and people used to have to put up bars at their doors to keep 'em out. And menny and menny a time has he seen a reel live Bullock march into his Master's Counting 'Ouse, with his two wild horns a sticking out, and as it was to narrer for him to turn hisself round, he used to have to be backed out tale foremost, with a fierce dog a barking at his nose.

Ah, them must have been rayther rum times, them must! How the peepel got about he don't seem quite to remember; but he says, as how as amost all on 'em lived at their warious shops and warehouses, and so mostly walked. There was, it seems, a few ramshackel old coaches, called Ackney Coaches—coz, they was all maid at Ackney, I suppose—all drorn by two ramshackel old Osses, and with werry shabby old drivers with wisps of stror round their shabby old hats. Then some brite Genus went and inwented Cabs, and they soon cut out the Ackney Coaches, which all went back to Ackney, and was never seen no more. And then, sum ewen briter Genus went and inwented Homnybusses, and they rayther estonished the Cabs, and what the next brite Genus will inwent in that line, I don't know, and SAM don't know, and I don't suppose as nobody else don't. But the most wunderfullest thing of all must have bin the having of no Perlice! For SAM, acshally declares, that before Perlice was inwented by Sir ROBERT PEEL—therefore wulgarly called Bobbys and Peelers—the only pertecters as London had at night was a lot of werry old men, all crissened CHARLEY, who used to sit in little boxes, such as the Solgers has at the QUEEN's Pallaces, with a little lantern hanging up in front, and when the Church Clocks all struck the hour, they all used to git out of their boxes and wark up and down the streets a calling out, "Parst Three o'Clock!" or "Parst Five o'Clock!" as it mite happen to be, and then go back to their little boxes, and hang up their lanterns, and quietly go to sleep! Ah, them must have been werry nice times for Messrs. DICK TUPPIN, JACK SHEPHARD, BILL SIKES, and Cumpny, unlimited. But, SAM says, as they made up for it by hanging ewery body as stole amost anythink, such as a sheep, or a fi-pound note, or a gold watch, and that on Mondays, which was Hanging Days, he has offen and offen stood at the hend of the Hold Baley and seen sum five or six pore retches, with white nite caps on, all a hanging together! and he says it all so serously that we are forced to bleeve him.

Then there's old slowcoach Jo, the tea-totaller. We all likes to work with him, and for a werry good reeson. But he's rayther a comical feller is Jo. He says, when peeple cums to know all the true fax of the case, they'll willingly pay dubble price for tea-total Waiters. And he reelly is such a poor simple fellow that I werrily bleeves as he bleeves hisself when he says it. I carn't think what he means by it; but BROWN says as it's a perfeckly shameful attack on the charackter of all us Waiters as ain't such fools as to be Tea-totallers, and that we really ort all of us to cut him. But no—I'm in favour of Free Trade in Waiters as in Wine, and I shoud think that, in this pertickler case, his hobstinacy brings its own punishment. For what can be a creweller life for a poor Waiter to lead, than to be constantly surrounded by harf emty bottels of most bewtifool Wines, of all kinds, so as to suit the most fastidgeous Waiter's taste, and not ellowd to taste ewen one glass of 'em! I thinks as I've heard of sum unfortnit hindiwidial, in holden times, as used to be seated down hevrey day to a werry scrumpshus dinner, but, whatever he fixt his mind upon, the Doctor woudn't allow him to taste it, not by no means. His name, I think, was SANKY PANSER, some relashun of MOODY and SANKY, I sposes. His master's name was DAN QUICKSHOT, ony another name, I bleeves, for BUFFALO BILL. But that was nothink of a case to wun as my son WILLIAM told us of the other day. It seems as there was, wunce upon a time, a Greshian Gent, by the name of TANTLUS, who, becoz he was found out in helping hisself to sum werry speshal brand of Neckter, was condemned to stand up to his neck in water for ewer so many years; and altho he was so dredfool thusty that he would have drunk a lot of ewen that cold, thin stuff, he wasn't allowed not to taste a drop; and, not only that, but there was a lot of most bewtifool frute a hanging jest above his pore hed, and whenever he tried jest to pluck a bit of it, the crewel wind blowed it away out of his reach. Hence the prowerb, "You be blowed!"

In course I don't pertend to know how these things was manidged in former times, but I werry much douts whether ewen a Greshian Gent's constitushun coud posserbly have stood it for ewer so menny years!

ROBERT.

CARON AND CHARON.

(After dipping into Major Le Caron's "Recollections.")

AT IT AGAIN!

The following correspondence and extracts have been sent to Mr. Punch for publication:—

MOST GRACIOUS IMPERIAL MAJESTY,

I have the honour to announce to your Majesty, that my spouse, the beautiful and accomplished clergyman-daughter, ANNA ANSELMA, whom, by your Majesty's ever-to-be-with-gratitude-remembered permission, I last year to the altar led, is now of good hope, and will shortly, if all should go well, add one to your Majesty's loyal and submissive subjects. I make this announcement in accordance with your Majesty's Hochzeit's Decree, Section 6.

And I remain, &c. &c. &c.,
DUMMWITZ VON HAMMELFLEISCH.

HERR DOCTOR,

I have received your letter. In accordance with Section 7 of my Hochzeit's Decree, I graciously give permission for the birth of the child referred to in your communication. I beg, at the same time, to point out that, by my Supplementary Decree (Proportions of Sexes), issued last week, it is necessary that the child should be a boy. Communicate this at once to the Frau K.E. Ober-Hof-Rathin Doctorin A.A. VON HAMMELFLEISCH.

(Signed) WILLIAM I. ET R.

MOST IMPERIAL MAJESTY,

Your with-satisfaction-received letter has been to my wife communicated. She desires me to assure you that she is your Imperial Majesty's obedient subject, (Signed) D. VON H.

"Frau ANNA ANSELMA VON