Jack Is it anything like Plaster of Paris?

Maude Jack, behave! I am so worried! (signs of tears.)

Valeria She's just tired, poor dear; don't tease her, Jack.

Maude (with dignity). I am not tired. He can't tease me, thank you, Valeria. I think, Madam, I will have Paris muslin. Silk is so common.

Jack Why don't you have bobinet?

Valeria Why, Jack, bobinet is–

Jack I know what bobinet is; heavy and kind of corded,–dead swell.

Maude That's pique!

Mr. De S. Well, children, defer that discussion until the Fourth of July. Is there time for a whole new rig?

Madam Y-e-s,–I think so.

Mr. De S. Cheer up, everybody! We'll have the prettiest frock in the outfit, if it breaks the R.I.P. Railroad! We are the people! I must go hunt those papers–things are stirred up so! Good-bye, Mamma, don't worry! Madam Sateene will save us! (goes).

Madam (rising with alacrity). I shall go look at Paris muslins. Shall I bring you samples?

Mrs. De S. No, I am not able to decide. We trust to you absolutely, Madam Sateene, absolutely. (groans). I believe I am going to have an attack! Oh, dear, my nerves! They actually twitch! I wish Matilda were of some use in such matters. Because she never graduated, she thinks Maude shouldn't! Jack, do you see my smelling salts?

(Jack hunts for the salts. Girls talk apart. Madam makes memoranda.)

Madam Miss Maude, how would you like ribbon, very narrow satin ribbon?

Maude Kate Saunders had that in–let me see,–oh, in 1900.

Valeria And that French Girl,–Giggre–wore it last year.

Madam O dear! (grimly). Anybody ever use rope?

Jack (grinning). Only men–for neck-ties mostly. I can't find it, Mrs. De Smythe.

Mrs. De S. Then Matilda has put it in the medicine chest. She is so neat! I can't help it–I don't want to have an attack! What shall I do? But I am afraid I–I am going to have one!

Maude (with signs of tears). O, Mamma, don't have an attack! What shall I do? No roses, no dress, no nothing!

Madam (resolutely). Well, you shall have a dress, about noon, to give you (with a tragic sweep of hand) if it is my last effort! Mrs. De Smythe, I'll drop in and report! (Goes hastily.)

Valeria I must go. I stopped for a list of my committee.

Maude (absently). Don't go. What committee?

Valeria Committee on Decorations.

Maude (vaguely). Committee on–?

Valeria Decorations. Wake up!

Maude (goes to desk). O yes! (rummages). This desk is disgraceful! Here it is! (Reads crumpled paper.) "Be it resolved–" goodness, that's about poor Ned Woodruff! Jack, who was on that committee?

Jack (smoothing Valeria's gloves on his knee). Miss Secretary, I do not keep the minutes.

Maude Well, you were presiding! (rummaging). Here it is,–six,–is that enough? Five, rather,–Hal Taylor won't serve.

Valeria (taking the list). O yes, he will.

Maude Said he wouldn't! Told Mabel Hopeland so last night.

Valeria (calmly). Yes, he will.

Maude Well, he said he wouldn't.

Valeria (pocketing the list, unmoved). He will if I ask him.

Maude (shutting desk with a bang). Oh!

(Enter Miss Hoppenhoer, with shawls, salt bags, etc.)

Miss H. Jennie, you'd better go to bed.

Mrs. De S. (sadly). I will. I hope I shall not have an attack.

Miss H. Attack! We'll all have an attack before Friday night! (She busies herself about the couch. Valeria and Maude go out.)

Miss H. Now, can you walk, do you think? I'd better call Katherine, hadn't I? Katherine! Be careful of that bag–it's hot–awful hot! Lean on me–(they go out, but Miss Hoppenhoer runs back to pick up things).

Jack Can't I help you! A fellow never knows what to do when–when–anybody has an attack.

(Maude returns.)

Jack Come on, Maude, I've got an old tandem out there. Let's take a spin.

Miss H. (dropping a shawl and two bottles). Got a what?

Jack Go get ready, Maude. A tandem.

(Maude goes.)

Miss H. (moveless with astonishment). You ride it?

Jack (respectfully). Yes, ma'am.

Miss H. (aghast). Ride it?

Jack (fascinated). Yessum. (earnestly). Yes, ma'am.

Miss H. Ride a tantrum! Well, such goings on! And all of it comes from graduating! Thank Heaven, I never graduated!

(Commences to pick up things. Curtain.)

ACT II.

Miss R. (decidedly). It is best to hold it in one hand.

Jack (surprised beyond measure). Oh, are you going to read it?

Maude (standing in the middle of the room). W-e-1-1, not exactly read it, you know.

Maude I really know it–almost.

Jack Then don't hold the paper.

Maude (apprehensively). Oh, but if I should forget!

Jack (confidently). You won't!

Maude I might! Oh, it's very easy for you to say orate, for you can!

Jack (conscious of ability). Yes, but you could, too.

Miss R. What is the subject of your oration, Mr. Hamilton?

Jack (modestly). "Universality in Statecraft."

Maude And it's a dandy! You ought to hear him when he comes to, "For of all the nations, builded of power and sealed with blood–" (in tremendous tones).

Jack Oh, now, Maude, I say, let up.

Maude