class="dent">The brush has got entangled in it! And I lost the comb yesterday.

Alice

[Takes out the brush and arranges the Queen’s hair.]

You look better now! But really you should have a lady’s maid!

White Queen

I’m sure I’ll take you with pleasure. Two pence a week and jam every other day.

Alice

[Who cannot help laughing.]

I don’t want you to hire me—and I don’t care for jam.

White Queen

It’s very good jam.

Alice

Well, I don’t want any today, at any rate.

White Queen

You couldn’t have it if you did want it. The rule is, jam tomorrow and jam yesterday—but never jam today.

Alice

It must come sometimes to “jam today.”

White Queen

No, it can’t, it’s jam every other day; today isn’t any other day, you know.

Alice

I don’t understand you, it’s dreadfully confusing!

White Queen

That’s the effect of living backwards, it always makes one a little giddy at first—

Alice

Living backwards! I never heard of such a thing!

White Queen

But there’s one great advantage in it—that one’s memory works both ways.

Alice

I’m sure mine only works one way. I can’t remember things before they happen.

White Queen

It’s a poor sort of memory that only works backwards.

Alice

What sort of things do you remember best?

White Queen

Oh, things that happened the week after next. For instance now:

[She sticks a large piece of plaster on her finger.]

There’s the King’s messenger—he’s in prison being punished; and the trial doesn’t even begin till next Wednesday; and of course the crime comes last of all.

Alice

Suppose he never commits the crime?

White Queen

[Binding the plaster with ribbon.]

That would be all the better, wouldn’t it?

Alice

Of course it would be all the better, but it wouldn’t be all the better his being punished.

White Queen

You’re wrong there, at any rate; were you ever punished?

Alice

Only for faults.

White Queen

And you were all the better for it, I know!

Alice

Yes, but then I had done the things I was punished for; that makes all the difference.

White Queen

But if you hadn’t done them that would have been better still; better and better and better!

Alice

There’s a mistake somewhere—

White Queen

[Screams like an engine whistle, and shakes her hand.]

Oh, Oh, Oh! My finger’s bleeding. Oh, Oh, Oh!

Alice

What is the matter? Have you pricked your finger?

White Queen

I haven’t pricked it yet—but I soon shall—Oh, Oh, Oh!

Alice

When do you expect to do it?

White Queen

When I fasten my shawl again; the brooch will come undone directly. Oh, Oh!

[Brooch flies open and she clutches it wildly.]

Alice

Take care! you’re holding it all crooked!

White Queen

[Pricks her finger and smiles.]

That accounts for the bleeding, you see; now you understand the way things happen here.

Alice

But why don’t you scream now?

White Queen

Why, I’ve done all the screaming already. What would be the good of having it all over again? Oh! it’s time to run if you want to stay in the same place! Come on!

Alice

No, no! Not so fast! I’m getting dizzy!!

White Queen

Faster, faster!

Alice

Everything’s black before my eyes!

[There is music, and the sound of rushing wind, and in the darkness the White Queen cries: “Faster, faster”; Alice gasps: “I can’t—please stop”; and the Queen replies: “Then you can’t stay in the same place. I’ll have to drop you behind. Faster—faster, good-bye.”]

SCENE THREE

When the curtain rises one sees nothing but odd black lanterns with orange lights, hanging, presumably, from the sky. The scene lights up slowly revealing Alice seated on two large cushions. She has been “dropped behind” by the White Queen and is dazed to find herself in a strange hall with many peculiar doors and knobs too high to reach.

Alice

Oh! my head! Where am I? Oh dear, Oh dear!

[She staggers up and to her amazement finds herself smaller than the table.]

I’ve never been smaller than any table before! I’ve always been able to reach the knobs! What a curious feeling. Oh! I’m shrinking. It’s the fan—the gloves!

[She throws them away, feels her head and measures herself against table and doors.]

Oh! saved in time! But I never—never—

White Rabbit

Oh! my fan and gloves! Where are my—

Alice

Oh! Mr. Rabbit—please help me out—I want to go home—I want to go home—

White Rabbit

Oh! the Duchess! Oh! my fur and whiskers! She’ll get me executed, as sure as ferrets are ferrets! Oh! you have them!

Alice

I’m sorry—you dropped them, you know—